been crying just now...

and i think im going to cry again

was thinking abt the past... while

watching shows tat can make me cry

so just now i was watching shows tat make

me cry, crying, lying on bed and writing smth

secret...my feelings..

was thinking of happy, sad times

and how i regret one thing tat i should not

had done! 1811 - 1908... the best times i had

both sad and happy! onli now then

i realise tat i love u since then and until now

it havent change abit although it might not

be the same as before but i noe i really still

love u! everytime i see u, it reminds me of all the gd

and bad times... we laughed, quarrel and gt mad at each

other and patch back! onli tat there was one

"obstacle" tat we cant pass though tat coz

us to nv be 2gether again...

i noe the pain i coz u was unbearable coz i felt it too

unless u had nv love me before...

there are times when i think wat would happen

if we were still 2gether and if jealousy had nv came

beyween us, will we still be 2gether...

but on the other hand, i was scared tat

if we ever patch back, it could affect our studies

or even more importantly, ur studies, will I affect it..?

other qns like did i felt happy when i was with u? did i felt

a semse of security with u, were u there when i need you?

did u care for me? or even love me? these qns smtimes

pop in my mind and coz me to think..

i strt to doubt tat u had nv love me... i wanted to

hear the three wrds, " I love you" from you and from the

bottom of ur heart and in person..

not in sms or emails...

i remember a few wrds tat u said to me tat coz my

heart to break! when i wanted to broke up

u nv stop it and just said ok! tat time i wasnt onli

mad but my heart was shattered to million of pieces..!!

and when u said "I wish for you to be happy" and left,

although didnt see but i was almost out with tears

and my heart too...! i could nv be happy when you r

not here with me...! i remember saying

" thank you for understanding" and at nite

i cried my heart out! how had i regretted!

i wish i had said " Daisuke! i will 4ever love u!

Pls dun leave me!"...