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so sleep together tonight
Hello there, a lover of purple,music, dance and taiwanese, korean drama love shows plus jap anime a dramatic person who always dream too much about fantasy and have a wide imagination on alot of things, both good and bad!! a hyperactive person who likes to jump about and cannot stay in a place for long oh boy, i love you :D 私はいつも、ねえ明興があなたを愛し together from 17th june 2008, on a tuesday morning |
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affiliates
Best Of Best Friends^^
Agnes<333 Xin Xin<333 Manddyy<333 Manddyy<333's tumblr Gwendolyn<333 Cassandra<333 LiLiang<333 Joanne<333 Nicole<333 Sarah aka salsa<333 Best Friends ^^ Boon Teck Dinika MangTeng Yue Qin School Friends =) Eugenia Huai Ao Joash Nigel QiaoTing Regina Vanessa YiWei Juniors =) Heather Li Joo Mei Qin Nataling Ruiyi TanLing Tricia XueTing Yu Xian Seniors =) Cherie aka childish gal Gerald Primary School Friends =) Alan KaiYan Yu Ting YueYing friend friend friend friend archives
credits
Design: doughnutcrazyIcon: morphine_kissed Do credit accordingly if you changed the icon. |
imagining
ok srsly hv nth to do..Pls read here before u continue! this post is writing how im feeling now if not interested pls head to the links or the red X button of the right hand corner wats the point of arguing when it nv ends.. feeling abit hot and cold here fever? or just imagining? maybe its coz i want to come down with fever so much ba so i can rest and stop saying things tat i dun mean i rmb last time when i was small i strted to imagine things like ohh.. wat if i faint in sch will the person i like come or will i be send to the hospital and this and tat happen my imagination very strong sia want to stop thinking aso cannot tats y even dreams aso come out weird weird de hv u ever realise tat sometimes ur dream protraits wat u want in real life or wat u want to discover nightmares are just when u imagine too much so u dream abt it maybe my theroy is wrong la but tat works for me *shit crying alr! wth, btr not let my aunt see* realise tat i imagine so much coz my mum aso de same wow! genes from her so its not surprising if i imagine myself in an accident here in jap or imagining myself nv coming bck or going bck as a soul, ghost after tat will strt thinking will anyone care for me there if really die liao funny rite i hate the word die coz i nv want to see people around me die.. but im always imagining myself dying or dun mind myself dying too but nv i want those around me to die.. tats y i hate it when they say die.. thinking whether anyone is waiting for me i noe alot of my friends read these will sure scold me de say they care for me i noe i always noe but maybe its just my imagination ba.. thinking so much.. srsly sometimes i will wonder if i disappear from the world who will care and most likely they will forget abt me after awhile maybe cry cry for like few weeks den wont liao who noes.. maybe yes maybe no.. so now u all noe le ba im not tat optimistic as i really am when im in front of u guys im not acting sometimes i really am but i same will always think of the worst and much much more den u can imagine coz my imagination alr too much tat i can handle one day can really hv my head burst if think so much tats y most of the time i dun find myself in a gd position to persuade people, give advise or comfort them coz im the same *omg getting a major headache just thinking now* i hate myself majority of the time for not being able to do this and tat for example i hate myself for not being able to help my friends i hate myself for always doing the wrong things i hate myself for making him upset or angry i hate myself for not being there when friends need me i hate myself for im not being a gd friend and many more cant help it i stay strong in front of others but nv when im alone i act strong in front of others but nv alone people might say i always act and i agree coz most of the time im acting dun most of the people too... tats y there was a time i really wanted to disappear from the world as people say im sick and tired.. i know its stupid but most people will think of it its nt surprising it just how do u handle it i find im really ridicous when i get angry over small things when i scold my friends for thinking negatively but i myself is the same.. im really tired for putting a fake mask.. but y im i complaining here other people aso de same ar putting a fake mask there is always a saying of " u might seem strong outside but actually u really need someone to care for u" sometimes i thinking im really tat kind of person but i nv want my friends to wry for me nor my family or him... i rather i take everything for them.. i dun need others to take care of me.. or so i think.. wat is the best for me i nv knew.. i imagine alot of things like being with him at this place and tat thinking this will happen and tat will happen but im not sure will it really happen for real as i say im just thinking alot of things can happen within one day which is 24 hr for the half of the day im smiling while smsing him and for the next sec my whole smile can gone coz weird things strted coming out from smiling, i would want to cry but in front of others tat fake mask comes up again and when i enter bck into the room the mask drops off immediately and tears flow down *like now, my fake mask is on, i holding bck my tears* and in another sec from crying u can just smile bck just tat funny u noe... 24 hrs early morning i was still happily smiling but now.. the whole mood change le miracle rite.. wat time holds for us so now i will still be thinking and thinking imagining things ba... maybe the next sec im ok or maybe i will be crying.. weird day.. u noe i wll always trust and believe u de ar not matter wat... its my fault for always saying the wrong words.. but i nv meant wat i said i noe it upsets u.. but it too upsets me.. im fine le.. no matter wat.. i will change for the btr... |